According to researchers at the University of Chicago*, the average American has only discussed his or her most personal concerns with two people during the last six months. For single parents in particular, especially those craving the support of community, this trend toward isolation makes an already-difficult job even harder. So how do you find friends? Share your best advice with our readers.
*Source: Allen, Scott. "It's Lonely Out There." The Boston Globe 23 June 2006. 25 Sept. 2006 [http://www.boston.com/news/nation/articles/2006/06/23/ its_lonely_out_there/?page=1].Share Your Tips
- I have lost all my friends due to my past decisions. Now, more than 11 years later, I'm a single mom in need of people who share the same outlook I have in life. My children come first, but it would be great if they knew mommy was happy with friends, too.
- —Guest Brit
Make the Effort to Find Friends
- It takes time to develop good friendships. When I meet someone I think I could really get along with, I make an effort to try and get to know them better.
- —Guest J.D.
Ways to Find Friends as a Single Mom
- In response to your question I'd like to offer a few suggestions of how a single mom can make new friends. 1) Join a single mom support group or form one. 2) Attend a family-friendly church and get involved. 3) Enroll the kids in soccer, basketball, gymnastics, etc. and become the team mom. 4) Hang out at the park with your kids, other moms are likely to be there. 5) Be open and friendly to everyone you meet. 6) Smile, forget about your problems, and focus on the other person for two seconds. I am a firm believer in showing yourself friendly in order to have friends, which I wrote about in my book 100 Secrets of Successful Single Motherhood: An Inspirational Guide for Single Moms.
- —Guest Samantha A. of www.singlemomsrock.net
Networking as a Way to Find Friends
- It's been a lot harder for me with my kids being older. When they were younger we had play dates and birthday parties and I always knew their friends' parents. Recently, my best luck has been with "networking" my friends: getting to know my male friends' girlfriends, and having girlfriends bring their other friends along when we get together.
- —Guest CollMomOf2
Share Child Care With Other Parents
- When my son was little, I joined a free Tots' Time program that had a place where he could slide, run, and play with other kids. I made a few friends there, and after awhile the parents would trade off time so we could run around the mall and do our errands one at a time.
- —Guest Polardog
Include Your Kids
- I have met new friends through work, my neighborhood, and through my interest in horses. However, I tend to gravitate toward people with kids around my son's age, because it's easier to get together and plan things when you can include the kids.
- —Guest RAPlacek