From the article: Visitation Rights and Visitation Refusal
Child visitation is supposed to be a time that both the parent and child look forward to, but there may be times when your child is reluctant and may even refuse to participate in visitation. Find out how to best handle this situation with these real-life child visitation stories. Share Your Story
I Want My Overnight Stays With My Child
- It is court ordered that I have alternating weekends and alternating holidays with my daughter, but my ex will not let me. Now she has filed a motion to not allow me any overnight stays with my child. I pay child support -- and very much, I might add. My daughter comes to visit a couple days a week but isn't allowed to stay. I am not a drunk or drug addict -- all I want is my daughter. I would think my ex would be happy; some people don't want anything to do with their kids. My daughter is 7, now and I have been fighting this for 7 years.
- —Guest Jeff D.
- My 3 yr old daughter loved to visit me until her mother moved in with a boyfriend. Now the mother says our daughter doesn't want to come. But when I go to pick her up, there are other children playing with my daughter. So of course she wants to stay and play! But the mother will not discuss anything with me.
- —Guest Kerry
Battered Divorced Visitation
- I was battered by my ex-husband in the marriage and finally struggled and was divorced. We have one child, and I have sole custody and control, but he has visitation rights. He uses the pick up and drop off to continue to bully and abuse me in front of our 8-year-old, and sometimes she starts crying. He is bi-polar, is on heavy medication, and drives her to his home 150 miles away every other weekend and back again. I fear for her safety and want the abuse against me to stop. What can I do? [Note from Jen: If you're concerned for your child's safety, you should go back to court and ask for supervised visits.]
Child Visitation Refusal
- My 10-year-old daughter doesn't like visitations with her father. He is unemployed and doesn't pay child support. He never took part in her life and he is always seeking visitation. The court ordered them to have visitation once a month. And I still don't understand why he comes all the way from Montréal to Ottawa. He sometimes even cancels the visitation. I want to move with my daughter, and I have full custody.
- —Guest Anonymous Girl
Violation of Visitation Rights
- My visitation rights have been violated for two and a half years. My son's dad won't let me take him, and he has no reason for this. I can't get legal help because of my finances, and I've been ordered to pay child support. Meanwhile, I am a single mother caring for three children on my own. Life is so unfair!
- —Guest Cgirl
Michigan Laws Concerning Visitation
- Debrina wrote that if child refuses visit, the custodial doesn't have to let child visit. MI law differs from this. The law states that refusal is not valid excuse. I do not, however, know what the law says can be done about it. I hear that forcing child to come is not allowed, but I have no idea to the truth of it. I don't want to have to force my child, but if I have the right, I will. The custodial parent doesn't do anything about the child refusing. In situations where both parents live together and the child disrespects one of the parents, the other parent should discipline the child and have him or her apologize and reconcile with the other parent. As ex's, we should show the same respect for one another!
- —Guest Ian
Older Kids Should Decide For Themselves
- My girls (10 and 14) hate visitation with their father, who is selfish, continually unemployed, doesn't support them, and when they are together he puts his needs ahead of theirs and isn't responsible. For example, he skips their lunches because he "forgot" or was "busy," doesn't supervise the 10-year-old or acknowledge that she has a mild disability, has neglected their meds in the past, and once made the older one care for the younger one who was vomiting because he had guests. Why should they be forced to see him? I am in process of changing the visitation order so he has no more overnights. After that, I am sure that high school events will take precedence over visitation for my 14-year-old, and middle school activities will cause the visitations to dwindle for the younger one. In my opinion, the courts shouldn't force this on kids who are capable of speaking for themselves.
I Send Them Anyway
- My kids sometimes act like they don't want to go for visits with my ex, but I encourage them to do it anyway. I know they're safe there, so that's not an issue, and if the tables were turned, I wouldn't want him to let the kids opt out of seeing me. When they're older, maybe it will be a different story, but for now we stick to the schedule.
- —Guest C. Burnes