How to Talk to Kids About Divorce, Separation, or an Absent Parent

The number one rule when talking to kids about divorce, separation, or an absent parent is to tell the truth. Never try to get away with lying, even when you suspect that an altered version of the real story would be easier for your kids to handle.

This is because, especially during a time when your kids are already hurting and filled with questions, your children need to know - without a doubt - whom they can trust. And as their parent, you need to be that person for them, even when a white lie would (if only temporarily) be less painful.

At the same time, though, you also have to be careful not to give your kids too much information or share opinions that would mar their own perceptions of their relationship with the other parent. As best as you can, stick to the questions you kids are asking, and respond in a calm and good-natured manner. In addition, when your kids come up with a question that would be inappropriate for you to answer, let them know that there are limits to how much detail you will give, and that adult matters will be kept between adults.

For more tips on how to handle talking with your kids about their questions, including specific "Dos" and "Don'ts," read the full article How to Talk With Your Kids About Divorce, Separation, or an Absent Parent.

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